You know when someone asks you a question and part of your brain is listening but then part of your brain is totally going about its previous business and another part of your brain is thinking about what chores still need to be done before bed and another part is wondering what will happen to the lesson plans you left sitting on the keyboard at someone else's computer at work and part of your brain is composing a grocery list?
And so then your mouth chooses some words to use to answer the question, but the words don't have anything to do with the words that are in your brain to answer the question because, HELLO! your brain is sort of busy right now.
It's like this:
My gal - "What happened?"
Me - "The electricity went off."
Gal - (sitting beside a fully operational lamp), "It did?"
Me - "What?"
Gal - "When did the electricity go off?"
Me - "I meant that I need a computer cord."
Well, my gal says that's called Word Vomit. And she says not to give her any credit, because it came from a movie. But I don't sit still long enough to see many movies, so in my mind she still gets credit.
In totally related news (related because it filled up my brain too much to worry about what came out of my mouth) we got back from our annual labor day camping trip yesterday.
Some years we've had insect infestations. One year my friend's son got his cornea scratched. Another year her other son fell out of a tree.
One year the bathroom was haunted. Seriously. The ghost flushed the toilet and everything.
Here's my boy and my friends' boy camping last year:And me, camping and reading a biography of Townes Van Zandt at the exact same time. Aren't I talented?This year we had:
raccoons stealing chicken from a cooler
fevers (my boy, then my gal)
an ear infection (my friend's nephew)
a torn ligament (by one of the adults)
streaking (including but not limited to a friend's 11 year old - "It was fun!")
consumption of mustard by teenagers until they vomited (as payment for a bet)
heavy downpours (did I mention our tent leaks?)
tent flooding (my friends' tent leaks worse)
screw your neighbor (The card game! Not an orgy!)
Let me just say that it turns out to take very little mustard to make a teenager puke. Razor says that's why they used mustard gas in World War...ummmm...One. Or two. Well, one of those two at any rate.
In all honesty, camping is way more fun without the rain and fevers. But I've gotta admit, there's something to be said for watching teenage boys barf mustard.
19 comments:
I have so been there myself with the word vomit! it is reassuring to know it is not just me!
Beth - Yeah, 'cause with me being the epitome of normal and all...well, at least you know you're not alone!!
:-) :-) :-)
I hate camping. I admire your ability to find the good side. I generally get through those weekends only by muttering "it's AFFORDABLE" under my breath the whole time.
But teenagers are wimps. I bet I could CHUG mustard. I am gonna have to dare the Sons...
Yes talented. Very.
Jill, yet another very informative post! lol Word vomit and mustard vomit...these are things I hadn't considered much until today! lol
OK - totally LOVE the word vomit thing!
But guzzling mustard? EWWWWWW.
EWwwwwwwwwww
That conversation you had with your gal is just awesome. That is totally how I talk.
Christine - I'm lucky that way, that is, I can almost always find the good side. I predict doom & gloom and then end up pleased as punch no matter what happens. It does help that I love camping though!
Thanks SJ!
Maureen & Creative Junkie - You would think "Eeeeeew!" wouldn't you? But actually, it turns out to be more of a sense of amazement that so little mustard would cause teenage boys to puke, especially while teenage girls in swimsuits are watching!
Janet - Glad I can be of some use around here! :-)
Alf - Yeah, it sort of fits in with your post titles, doesn't it? You should come over sometime! We can have entire conversations consisting of nothing but nonsequitors!
Huh. I could look through your archives but didn't your last camping trip (or one that you posted about which may not have been your last before this one) involve a downpour? Or at least drive through a downpour to get there.
I would probably understand what you mean if we were talking together if I knew a little bit of what was going on like how needing a computer cord ended up "electricity went off"
My mom does this to me all the time. She has ADHD along with some creative neural/word connections so sometimes I can follow the tenuous linking between ideas. I can tell that she assumes I know what she is thinking (she admits to this and knows that it's a whacky belief) so she'll "skip to the end" which is just as bad as when she goes through something that happened to her as ACCURATELY as possible: "The taxi picked me up at 2:36pm and my appointment was for 3:30 and I wanted them to pick me up at 3:15 because it only takes 12 minutes to get there even with traffic and then I don't have to wait..you know how I hate waiting.. and.."
And then there's the missing links conversation where I'll ask something like, "So how did your appointment go?" and the answer will be, "I was able to get French Donuts!"
Which means that all went well because she drove, she was able to find parking and make it to this donut shop she likes that is on the way back home...
Regarding the mustard and vomiting - ick. I actually like mustard! I like it waaaay more than mayonnaise and ask for extra mustard instead of mayo on sandwiches. I dunno about eating it straight though.
Vomiting - urk. I could never be bulimic because I don't like to throw up! The only times I "want" to is when I feel nauseous or have food poisoning. Lucky me, if I eat something bad, it WANTS OUT within a short time (not some 2 day delay like some people describe) and once it's out, well, then I start to feel better. But blech.
I am guessing your purse was stockpiled with insect repellents and OTC medications!
Townes Van Zandt,huh? I never heard of him until you! I am not all that knowledgeable about music and just recently discovered Leonard Cohen!
Love the word. Learned something mew again.
Know everything about that sort of brain function too.
Ms.Q - No wonder I like your mom so much!!!! I think maybe I *am* your mom...are you sure you're not Jewish?
I'm impressed with your memory! Last camping trip we arrived at the campsite in the dark while it was pouring down with rain & had to wait for it to let up to set up the tent. I think that was the only rain we got though.
I don't actually believe in insect repellent, but luckily Jared was complaining about his sore throat right as we were leaving, so I threw some children's tylenol into my bathroom kit.
Middle Ditch - Well this ****IS**** an educational blog after all!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)
Aren't raccoons the sneakest little suckers! While we were camping one year in New England, we had a cooler full of beer and those raccoons were determined to get them out!
Carey - I knew for certain they were sneaky (they used to take the bungie cords off the garbage can lids that my dad specifically put on there to keep the raccoons out!) but I had no idea they were drunks!
Nice legs Jill.
Ricardo knows how to focus on what's important.
This sounded like the best camping trip ever!!!
Thanks Ricardo!!!!
Ms.Q - He's just trying to get me back for calling him compassionate!! :-)
Lotus - Aren't they ALL?!?!?
Post a Comment