My Kid Looks Like a Giant Mushroom Just Ate her Head. But She's HAPPY Mushroom Food. And most mushroom food isn't quite this cute either.

Did you ever wonder why sometimes you see kids with bows that are bigger than their entire heads and you're all, "I wonder what's wrong with that kid's head?"

It turns out that I can answer that very pressing question for you. Nothing's wrong with the kid's head. It probably has a very gorgeous head. But it's like this: Mom's all walking around her favorite bargain store looking for notepads or whatever and spies this flower-dy hat. Since it's half price off of next to nothing, it seems kind of silly NOT to buy it.

Mom goes home and adds it to the building ranks of stuff that is coming for the still imaginary kid. You know, little band t-shirts, board books and little Levis with hide nor hair of anything practical. Like diapers or or wipes a changing table. Or a crib. The hat is the least of mom's worries, because honestly, "Who could fit her head into something so small?!?!?

And then the baby is born and mom puts the hat with a flower on the baby and suddenly it's like,

"Oh man! That thing just ate my baby's whole head!"

So then mom waits four more months and tries it again. Because now baby's head is bigger, but still looks like a mushroom just ate it. A really giant mushroom that knows how to work it's way center and front even though mom had on purpose put it off to one side.

They say you have to suffer for fashion. I wouldn't actually know if that's the truth or not. But I do know why some moms have hats and headbands that have the baby for lunch rather than the other way around.

Anyway, the kid is four months old now but is still hat chow. Maybe best to just make her another headband or two: