Why Moms Can't Get to Costco. Or anywhere else for that matter. At least this mom can't.

I just wanted to post a Happy New Year photo of the Head of Demolition (now 5 years old) but then I was all, "I need some words to go with it. Because I haven't put any words on the blog in a long time." So here's how we get to Costco early in the morning. Or actually wait...it's afternoon now.

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Announce that we're leaving and request that 5 year old please get dressed.

Give 5 year old a second breakfast.

Remember that I lost my debit card two days ago. Wonder if Costco takes the MasterCard that remains in my purse.

Look up weather.

Ask 5 year old to get dressed.

Look up payment information online for Costco to see if they take MasterCard. They don't. Decide to go to the bank for cash.

Process two photos and answer a comment on Facebook.

Ask 5 year old to get dressed.

Put together list of groceries needed at Costco.

Help 5 year old to dress Snoopy doll. Remind her to get dressed.

Tell 5 year old she can only help put up signs around the building announcing a homeowner's association meeting if she gets dressed.

Call Trader Joe's to see if they might have my debit card. They do.

Walk downstairs (with 5 year old dressed in pajamas) to tape signs in elevator, on stairwell, and near mailboxes.

Head back upstairs to apartment. Ask 5 year old to get dressed.

Separate laundry. Put in one load.

Ask 5 year old to get dressed.

Give a State of the Bath Soap Address to an appreciative audience of one 20 year old. Put bath soap on the Costco list.

Thank 5 year old for getting dressed.

Walk to Trader Joe's to collect debit card and return two full rolls of Trader Joe's stickers that somehow made it into our grocery bag.

Return home. Get in car.

Argue with five year old about where the Snoopy dog can sit on the way to the store.

Argue with five year old about whether or not the Snoopy dog's toy stroller needs to go in the trunk.

Restrict Snoopy dog's seating to the rear of the car.

Leave for Costco only two to three hours after the intended departure time.

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So really, I have no idea why it takes me an entire morning to get out the door. This, among so much else in life, remains a mystery.

Happy New Year all!