And where exactly IS the Failure in Life Center is what I want to know

I've been meaning to post this picture for a good, long time. Because I'm just sure this place must have a sister company named, "The Failure in Life Center"From this picture it's pretty evident that it's a church, because of the Easter message. It was more ambiguous the first time I saw it. But, just in case there was any doubt, my friend Missy discovered that actually it has drive through prayer:
Yeah so anyway, it turns out success in life is practically guaranteed because they have COUPONS for counseling with the pastor.I didn't even know you NEEDED a coupon to see a pastor.

I'll bet the sister company, "The Failure in Life Center" has a coupon for a pastor who rushes you and only feigns interest in your problems.

I saw this food product at the grocery store. I honestly like stuff made out of soybeans. In fact, I truly prefer soy sausage to pig sausage. But if I'm going to eat tofu, I like it to at least PRETEND to look like a familiar food.I mean, is "Good Stuff" fake chicken? Fake pork? I like to know what it is I'm not eating.

I saw this game from Discovery Toys. Man, the fun and intensity that game must offer! I bet kids can hardly wait to be safe!Here's my boy, winning the Keter Shem Tov award. I'm pretty sure that's an award for making his mom proud.Here's my Sweet Pea, not studying for finals. I have a hard time forcing her to study when she's doing something so productive.Let's see, I didn't actually get a picture of Older Gal making me proud this week. She did kill a cockroach with her shoe though, and asked if she could go into Gaza when we go to Israel ("Only if you want to be stoned!" replied Younger Gal), both of which I thought were pretty brave from a gal who is at loose ends if she has to drive through flood waters.

That's our week! School's out, so I'm hoping for a come back!

Coupon & drive through prayer pictures

I Found a Little Boy Yesterday, But I Gave Him Back

Another school year is coming to a close. Gone for this year will be the opportunity to teach and influence young minds. Gone the opportunity to see the excitement in each child's face. Gone the opportunity to bring home lice.

My gal says I have the worst job in the world just because I bring the occasional louse (and other communicable diseases) home from work. I don't though. I have a great job and hours conducive to raising children. I do get exposed to all sorts of fun stuff though.

Yesterday I found a four year old while rollerblading. He was at a park wandering around all by himself. There were seven soccer games in progress, but he was nowhere near any of them.

My boy and I tried to find his grown ups for about a half hour before someone finally claimed him. Making things more difficult was the fact that the boy's speech was delayed. He was completely unintelligible except for the words, "mommy gone" and "car". It turned out that the adults he was with figured he had gone to the restroom all that time. By himself. For a half hour.

Mostly I've been awash in research papers this week, but I did manage a few photos. Here's part of the "senior prank" at my kids' school.
Front:

And back:
Here's my boy getting a haircut:
Last but not least, here's that good for nothin' cat. He may be a pain in the neck, but at least he's observant. Picture thanks to Older Gal:

My Gal Wants the Title of This Post to be "I'm Having Stress". So that's the title. Actually, I AM having stress. I hear it goes great with Valium.

I'm having wedding stress and work stress. I'm having I'm not sure why I went back to school stress.

Wedding stress sounds like this sometimes:

My sweet pea - I wish we could have Hayes Carll.
Me - Yeah. Me too.
Her - But I bet he would be really expensive.
Me - Probably.
Her - You would have to have your wedding in a warehouse. You would have your wedding dress and Hayes Carll and nothing else.
Her - Not even shoes.
Me - I might not have shoes anyway. I haven't been shopping.
Her - Yeah, but you wouldn't have decorations. Or cake either. But you'd be super happy!
Me - I'm already pretty happy sweetie.

She doesn't realize that we're already not having any decorations. The bar has cowboy hats hanging everywhere and I think those little beer advertisement flags. So that's one thing taken care of. And I never really cared much for cake.

Here's what bedtime stress sounds like sometimes:

Me - We got Sugar in 2001 and Nimue in 2005. So that's only four years Nimue will have to live without Sugar and be companionless. That's not as bad as I thought.
Older Gal - But we're saving up to clone our cat!
Me - Oh yeah! I wonder...
My Boy - Yeah! We can clone him and have another Shuguee!
Me - I wonder if...
Younger Gal - Would you stop counting the time until Sugar's going to die?!?!
Older Gal - But we're going to clone him!
My Boy (earnestly and seriously) - Ummm...but I forgot...I'm saving up to fight terrorism.

Because if counting up the years until your housepets' eventual demise ain't a relaxing way to send your kids off to bed, I don't know what is.

The kids actually do own these piggy banks, but it was easier to swipe the pictures from these places than to take them myself:
Cat bank
Terrorism bank

Personally, I'm saving up to buy valium. I hear it's good for stress.


Valium bank

The Angry Mesclun Lettuce That Ate Houston

Hello long lost blog! How I've missed you! I'm sorry to abandoned you and facebook and the bloggers and the rest of internetdom that isn't directly related to professional journals or the university's online portal.

I've taken a lot of pictures for you, and I promise to show them to you...sometime. Look! I have a couple today!

It never occurred to me that lettuce would outgrow those cute balls you see them in at the grocery store. But The-Guy-Who-Knows-A-Song-About-A-Chicken described this lettuce as "angry":Here's my good for nothing cat, licking an ipod cord as if it were a Popsicle. He LOVES those things!Here's a picture of a big giant truck with a teeny tiny blue sticker on the back advertising the wind energy they use at home.
Which is a HUGE relief, because the first thing I think when I see a huge, giant squeaky clean empty vehicle with one person inside is, "I wonder if they practice environmentalism at home?"

I apologize for lacking the time to load my ancient version of photoshop onto this computer so I could blur the license plate. Feel free, I suppose, to hunt the driver down in order to offer congratulations for being so conscientious.

As for lack of time, if it's any consolation, my card making pastime has really taken a hit too. I promise to be more diligent in June (when I'm only taking classes full time and planning a wedding, instead of doing both those things AND working full time). I promise to be more diligent in June! I'll try to be more diligent in June, oh hobby-o-mine.