We're not in Vacationland. But it's sort of like Vacationland. It's called Mom & Dad's.

Again, through the magic of the internet, I'm not even here. I'm visiting at my parents. Here's my baby nephew, isn't he the cutest?!?!?

Here's my boy skiing. I skied too, but luckily there wasn't a picture, because I wore purple snow pants and just missed looking like a giant grape by half of an outfit.My Sweet Pea went back to the hospital, but I didn't even manage a picture this time. It was asthma, and don't worry - she's doing well.

In lieu of an asthma picture, I offer these people we saw in Houston right before we left, bundled nice and warm against the cold:It was in the high 50s/low 60s mind you.

I also have this one sign I saw while skating last week:I mean, I try NEVER to leave money on shelves. But there wasn't even a shelf. There were some cubby type things nearby, but no shelf. So that makes it way easier to comply.

Have a great New Year everyone!!!!!

Satan Controls All Fun. I didn't actually decide that. I saw it on a church sign today.

As I type this it's a few days before Christmas and the temperature is in the 80s. Still, Houstonians make a valiant effort, don't they?

If that's not enough to fill you with holiday cheer, I don't know what is!

Maybe the depths of despair would be more up your alley? Speaking of which, I saw this on my way to bring the kids to school:
Just in case you missed it, that would be:
Really?!?!?! ALL fun?!?!? Like, even wholesome fun like playing catch? What about baseball?

Does Satan control board games? What about those big inflatable play things that kids bounce around in?But maybe Satan SHOULD control those big, inflatable play things that kids get into a bounce around. SOMEBODY has to make sure that the big kids don't all go in at the same time and trample the little kids.

I'm actually kind of surprised there wasn't a stampede to attend that church such that I couldn't even get a photo...

At any rate, in case I don't get to post again before New Years (especially if I get smote and all from making fun of a church sign) have a great Christmas and New Years too! Most importantly, try not to let Satan control all your fun!

This Shin is Done Dug

We've had about all the shin digs a body can stand in the past couple few months. Thanks to everyone for my boy's bar mitzvah! Thanks to people who don't like to speak in front of crowds but who still read stuff, especially if they read it in a language they didn't know.
  Thanks to my cousin for calling me before the break of dawn to make sure the music was perfect!


Thanks to Older Gal for pitching in whenever and however she could. Thanks to people who drove and flew incredible distances to be here, and to people who came even though they just got out of the hospital (and thanks for these party pictures too Debbie)! Thanks to my sister-in-law who took sole care of my baby nephew and withstood computer problems and other storm and strife just so my brother and older nephews could come. Thanks to my other cousin for holding up the Torah even though I forgot he just had back surgery. Thanks to people who came short distances, but had to fight galleria traffic to get to the party location or drive in the dark on Friday night. Thanks to my coteacher for not complaining even though I had to use each and every classroom break to make phone calls. Thanks to all my coworkers. Even though I just invited people I work with directly, I truly wish it could have been all the teachers. Thanks to my Sweet Pea for trailblazing and for helping her brother out all she could. And thanks to my other cousin for reassuring me that it's perfectly normal to discover people I should have invited every time I turn around. Thanks to my cousins and relatives and friends who wished they could be there but couldn't. Thanks to friends who did stuff to help, and friends who offered to help.Thanks to Mom and Dad who always do everything they can to make everything better and thanks to my brother for coming to Houston (premier vacation spot that it is) twice in six months. Thanks to all my boy's teachers and the rabbi and the cantor and the gabbai and everyone at the synagogue. And thanks to The-Guy for being my strength when I didn't have any. Thanks of course to anyone who read this far and everyone for everything, especially in this crazy holiday filled month.More pictures to come!

The Iternet is Magical. I look like I'm here, but really I'll be back tomorrow or Monday.

If all goes as planned, I'm not actually posting this right now, I'm listening to my boy read Torah!Except, hopefully he's wearing a suit instead of Christmas colors. At least that's the plan anyway. You know, the plans I've had more than two years to make, but decided to pack into two and half weeks instead?

At any rate happy birthday to my boy! He's thirteen today, on his bar mitzvah day!!!!

I hope everyone had a great week and has a great weekend and I will catch up with everyone because VACATION!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!

Jill

I have six papers due plus my boy's bar mitzvah all in the next eight days. So how can I really be expected to think up a decent title I ask you?!?

When I mentioned my need to learn to plan a bar mitzvah in two and a half weeks, my friend Beth came up with this helpful hint:

I think first and foremost, you give everyone the wrong time and then print up correction postcards and forget to mail them. Isn't that the way you do it?

And that is exactly, exactly what I did!!!! So I'm good there.

But I'm not the only one working hard on this event. My boy has been studying practically since he was born. The-Guy is acting as his personal postman. Older Gal is tempering our bad moods with baked goods.

And of course my Sweet Pea is doing her darndest to free up beds for relatives. She does this by making herself at home (as usual) in the ER. (A door closed on her foot, but don't worry, she's fine):Even the good for nothing cat is pulling his weight, by reminding us that you should not forget to stop and smell the roses.
Eat some too. They're delicious.

And when you're done, feel free to drink some of the water from the vase. 'Cause all those rose petals make a body very thirsty. Apparently.
Plus, the roses are decimated anyway, so how much water could they really need?

Hope everyone has had a nice week! Thank you for the good thoughts for my friend - it will still be a long road, but so far so good!!

How to Plan a Bar Mitzvah in Two and a Half Weeks

I don't actually know how to plan a bar mitzvah in two and a half weeks, but I'm trying to learn. If I get any worthwhile experience, I'll pass it on. Come to think of it, I have a day less than two weeks now.

There's just not another way to describe this week besides "bad". A good friend of my parents passed away unexpectedly and a good friend of mine discovered a very serious health condition.

Here she is all happy and dancing at the wedding. She's in black, I'm in the makeshift wedding dress, and my other friend is in greenish-yellowish and black, and they're both of them the best friends a person could ever want:But she made it through what more or less amounts to brain surgery, so even though it's Chanukah, it's actually a second Thanksgiving.

So happy (C)han(n)uk(k)a(h) people! That's how my friend/coworker has decided it should be spelled and I completely agree. And happy second Thanksgiving too!

Between the lost goats and the dog that sounds like it needs to be flushed down the toilet, there must be a title around here somewhere.

Here's my boy, getting his yellow belt:

My small camera has a lot of settings: one for portrait, one for snow, one for fireworks. There is no "rotten lighting, through a glass window, constant movement, bright primary colors on every surface" setting though. So that was the best I could do.

I love downtown. I love the light rail, and the graffiti, and the old brick buildings, and the crack heads offering to watch your car for you, and the signs.No sleeping standing in doorway. I love it! Does that mean you can sleep in the doorway if you're sitting down? What if you're slumped against the door sill? Could you sleep all curled up in the doorway lying down?

And I love the lost goats. I mean, right near the center of the fourth biggest city in the United States, people lose goats.And I love that even when we're late for the airport, my man turns right around and does a U-Turn if he sees a sign about lost goats. So that's what makes him the perfect man for me. That, of course and the fact that he enjoys songs about chickens...and whiskey.

My Sweet Pea found this book in the bargain bin of a close out store:I just can't IMAGINE why it didn't sell. I mean, I don't know what kind of euphemisms are popular in your area, but around here caca and poopoo are pretty much the same thing.

On that appetizing note I leave you with this Thanksgiving cartoon, which I've used before, but I still like:Hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving and ate a lot of big dead bird!

Taking photos while driving: possibly a more socially acceptable hobby than defending meth heads. I must have a good hobby around here somewhere...

When I started this blog, those two nice teenagers who you can see in the sidebar were a little younger than this:They've more or less grown up blogged. And so that must be why now, when My Boy accidentally knocks a shelf out of the refrigerator, my Sweet Pea's instinct is to run for the camera:
And what I end up hearing is that he knocked a shelf out, "but don't worry! I got pictures!" Far be it from her to leave spilled salsa undocumented - that's my girl!!

I was met with these wasps in the bathroom the other morning:It's a far cry from the rose petals I found last time, I tell 'ya!

I wish I could have gotten a better photo while I was driving, but here's a bunch of birds:
I don't just need a photography class, I need a photography-while-driving class. In fact, if Leisure Learning doesn't offer it, I might just have to start teaching it as an after school enrichment class.

Except, my preschoolers can't drive. But that's okay. Maybe my Sweet Pea can drum up some business for me at her high school. There are probably just oodles of teens all clamoring to learn to photograph spilled salsa while driving. I think.

In any case, that's about all I've got this week - it's been another busy one! Here's to a Happy Thanksgiving to everyone just in case I don't manage a Thanksgiving post!

I Just Don't Want to See Meth Heads Getting a Bad Name

Last night I argued on the side meth heads in my master's class. I don't know why, since I don't even know any meth heads. The-Guy is probably right, and my compassion is probably misplaced. Plus, I don't think the professor truly appreciated it. So if you know any meth heads who happen to be outstanding, stellar parents, could you please let me know? 'Cause it might help my grade.

Almost a full decade later, I am now updating this post. It's not that I feel sorry for meth heads. I don't even know any meth heads. This is from the comments section and the real reason I found myself inexplicably defending imaginary meth heads during my Master's class:

"I think that's what really bothers me, so maybe it's something different than empathy - when people speak about addicts as if they weren't even human and didn't have feelings, as if they were not real people, dealing with real pain and real problems." - Me in the comment section of this selfsame blog post.

And now back to the post as it was originally posted, pictures and all:

Here's a sad sight. My Boy at the radio station. The DJ asked him to help out. There's a band playing in the lobby; you can see them through the doorway. What's he doing? Playing a video game on my ipod.

Oh well. What can you do? (I mean, besides drag him to volunteer at a radio station every now and again and hope it takes)Here's a mom and son having a little picknick tailgating thing. I didn't capture it well, but I like a lot of contradiction...like the fact that this sweet scene with the pretty sunset is happening in a Walmart parking lot.Here's my good for nothing cat. I think it's still called multitasking if one of the activities is a nap, isn't it?
Here's my Sweet Pea feeding that very same cat a dinner roll:I have these things. They got lousy reviews on Walgreens.com (where I happened to get the picture). I think they work pretty well compared to other wax strips. Sort of a strange name though:The-Guy and I had a conversation something like this last night:

Him: I'm going to lay down, but keep on doing your homework.
Me: Oh, I'm not doing any more homework.
Him: I thought you were defending meth heads.
Me: Oh yeah, I am defending meth heads. But that's it. I'm not doing any more homework after that.

We went to a wedding reception at a Mormon church in which the couple's car was decorated entirely in penises in the mistaken belief that the bride wanted it done that way. Unfortunately I didn't get a picture.

But other than that, it's been a thankfully uneventful week. Just working myself silly on homework, baking dinner rolls, defending meth heads, admiring a bride's would-be-penis-mobile...that kind of thing. Hope everyone else has had a good one too!